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Morning Meditation from The GratiDude
I asked one of my coaches to the coach, Rob Toomey, yesterday to give me a little bit of advice around some friends of mine that are struggling with impending midlife crisis situations going on.
The harder I pushed to try to help them the more they pulled back, and it seems like I’m falling into some other familiar pattern that I’ve had in past relationships where I feel like I’m doing the equivalent of “pushing rope.”
Have you ever tried to push that heavy rope that they use for tug of wars in the air? Impossible, right?
However, what I’ve realized in life is that whatever situation I’m going through if I asked for help, I’ll find out that there have been other people that have also gone through similar situations and that I can learn from there, successes and mistakes, and not have to guess on some approaches that might be affective.
Facing trauma head-on can be difficult, but it is an essential step in healing. Here’s why:
You’ll gain insight: Facing your trauma can help you understand why the event occurred and how it has impacted your life, and this can help you make sense of your experience.
It can help you understand your emotions: Facing your trauma can help you better recognize your emotions and why you feel them as you reflect on your experiences, behaviors, and reactions.
It can help you to process your trauma: Facing your trauma can help you to deal with it in a healthy way rather than avoiding it or suppressing it. This can help you to get through the recovery process with greater clarity and self-care.
It will allow you to heal and move on. Facing your trauma can be difficult, but it can also be a necessary step in the healing process. It is the first step towards recovery and moving on with your life to find peace, joy, and happiness.
You’ll gain control. By facing your trauma, you can gain control over your emotions and reactions to the event, and this can help you feel more empowered.
It can help you to find support. Facing your trauma can help you find support from friends, family, and professionals, which can be invaluable in your healing journey.
You will build resilience. Facing your trauma can help you build stability and strength, and this can help you cope with difficult situations you may encounter throughout life.
It will help prevent future trauma. Facing your trauma can help you recognize and avoid situations that could lead to future trauma, which can help you stay safe and healthy.
In the video here they lead you to believe that you know which one of the two buddies is suffering from some mental illness or not feeling well and spoiler alert. It’s not the guy who you think it is.
There are some things that you can look out for, signs that are from lack of action, they are really signs that are the lack of signs.
Let me explain.
If you know for sure that a friend is gone through a really challenging situation or particularly a big life change like a loss of a loved wine or a divorce, or a child that has gone wayward and perhaps become an addict, these life scenarios that are very common can really be triggering and in some cases debilitating for folks if they don’t realize the importance of processing their emotions and trauma and quite honestly releasing some of that pain in the form of talking and tears.
Now that I’ve released much of the control of regulating or judging my own emotional reactions during my life experience, I find that tears will pop up like a flash thunderstorm and just go away and there’s no calls for alarm.
Sometimes I find myself being surprised that tears are flowing, but I don’t judge it, and later I will look back and be curious about what it was that I was tapping into on a deeper level that elicited that type of emotion for me.
What I decided to do yesterday with my buddy, was to share the information of my therapist here in Sarasota that I was introduced to in an attempt to utilize counseling to prevent my divorce from happening.
My doctor Dr Bruce was super fantastic and within the first hour helped me understand some of the anger and sense of rejection. I had around my father and his decision to take his own life as he was dying from emphysema, going broke, and about to get divorced.
“Damn! Who are you so mad at Kevin?”
And I knew immediately who I was mad at and the fact that I took Dr Bruce to help me see this is fundamental to the whole therapy process.
You must have an outside perspective for some of this deep shit so that you can unwind it and see some of the lies that you told yourself exactly what they are.
So, I sent him Dr Bruce’s information. I’m not super optimistic that he will contact him, but the idea of Therapy will plan to see and maybe some good will come to it.
And guess what?
If I think of a different way or another way that I might be of help to that same friend, I will send that information as well. I will keep showing up every single day so that my friend knows that when he is ready, I will be here.
That’s all I can do and let him know how much I love him unconditionally no matter what forever, ever, and ever.
Think about your Rolodex of friends and most of them have been through some heavy stuff within the last few years so why don’t you circle back with them and just ask a question like “how are you feeling now that you’re back into the dating world after your divorce? Is it fun, weird, or scary? Tell me a little bit about that won’t you?.”
Or, for the friend with the addict son:
Have you heard from your son in the last few weeks? I pray for him every morning and I hope that he finds the strength to get the help he needs so that he can get back to being a healthy version of himself. He’s such a wonderful, wonderful child I’d love him very much.”
Open the door for conversation for healing and just make sure that your friends and family are processing their experiences and their traumas by talking about them crying, getting support, getting hugs, and feeling loved.
That’s your homework for today folks and it’s a heckuva way to show your friends in the world and attitude of gratitude.
EVERY DAY:
Love
and
Gratitude
https://www.instagram.com/GratiDude_abides
KevinACarpenter@gmail.com/941.894.8030
Thank you sincerely.
IN LIFE AND GOLF, GET BETTER…..NOW!
HERE: https://grateful4.org
Every day, every way, grateful.
KC
I am here to help, add somebody that needs a “check up from the neck up”
KevinACarpenter@gmail.com
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