Thanks Mom and Dad! I’ll NEVER do what you did, so I appreciate your teachings.
Moving this to the TOP, as this is the Foundation.
Join me daily and create your own G.I.F.T.
Don’t just read it.
Live it.
The G.I.F.T. Today
Grateful: for embracing patience and process as I know first hand that all those “overnight” success stories took 10 years
Intention-more kindness more love more kindness. Why not?
First-connect on kid logistics next two weeks
Things-Greg call and see if cool to swing by
Morning Meditation from The GratiDude
Processing trauma and integrating your upbringing without being a victim mentality is a profound and cool experience.
I first heard of this concept of improving upon your parents and treating their approach and methodology to their lives as a blueprint from a book a roommate gave me in college. That book that first opened me up to looking at my upbringing differently was “The Celestine Prophecy” by James Redfield. The book I s a very mystic allegory and it includes a lesson about understanding and letting go of the past, which some say means that we are not only the physical creation of our parents, but also their spiritual creation.
The book also discusses how childhood traumas can block our ability to experience the mystical, and that all humans tend to fall into one of four “control dramas” based on their upbringing.
The Celestine Prophecy is based on ancient wisdom from a Peruvian manuscript and is intended to help readers see connections between current events and what might happen in the future. It’s described as a gripping story of adventure and discovery, and a guidebook that can help readers understand why they are where they are in life.
This book had a real Mystic aura, and all my student friends were sharing it and passing it around and there was a section about how to interpret your upbringing and to learn from it. one of the messages was that the way your parents lived and behaved can turn out to be a lesson not only in what is possible, but also what things you may want to avoid do differently or be very sensitive to your own life.
It could be personal decisions around health and wellness, it could be the types of behaviors they exhibited, or the way that they acted in their interpersonal relationships that perhaps were super positive and things you want a model or examples of things that you don’t wany model, which can be just as valuable from a learning perspective.
Sometimes we learn what NOT to do, and our Parents provide a Blueprint of how NOT to parent.
Reality.
What is a parental blueprint?
Let’s breakdown the idea of the parental blueprint and see if you can relate this to your own life.
In the simplest terms, a parental blueprint is a collection of how your parents raised you, their behaviors, thoughts, feelings, habits, routines, reactions and general engagement with you and the world around you.
What you see, hear and feel around your parents, the environments they created and the experiences you go through together form a large basis of the very first version of your operating system, think iOS v1 or Android beta – it’s the learn and see how this works phase.
The critical thing here, though which is very hard for many people, is to be able to look on your parents as people, doing the best that they could, just like us now. Embracing forgiveness allows us to move into a place where we forgive decisions in behaviors of our parents. When we get to that point and let go a little bit, we can now think a little bit more objectively and look for lessons that could be learned.
For me, I had to forgive and let go of anger at my parents, for example, for them not being actively engaged and present for the things that were important to me in my childhood and Teen years. Coming to games, knowing what I was up to, just showing that they gave a fuck(still struggle at times with this anger).
Because of my experience and some of the disappointments I felt when my parents weren’t attending my school functions or athletic events, I decided I was going to be extremely present and active and show up for everything that mattered to my kids.
This is the Lemonade from Childhood Lemons.
I even went and watched my oldest kid cheerleading at away games at junior football just because I wanted her to look up and see me there. She was spending her time and practicing and even though it wasn’t a huge aspect of her life, I wanted to show my face and give her some support and she appreciated that.
I’ll ask my kids about school functions and things like that and just double check and see if they want me to attend or not and sometimes, they let me know to stand down that it’s a unimportant thing other times they’re very direct and tell me they would really like me to be there. I love it when they tell me they want to be there because I love being there and they want me there.
I’ve taken difficult childhood and turned into something beautiful now because the pain that I experienced taught me that I don’t want my kids to experience that and conversely, they’re now experiencing fun and cool memories around these events because they have family and friends and squad attending, which really makes you feel good and feel supported which is what everybody wants.
The same goes for coworkers and friends when they have things that they’re doing, running a half marathon for the first time or doing some public speaking, or making a big presentation.
It’s cool for us to just show up and pop our face in and give some encouragement, even if we don’t say anything.
Just showing up we say everything that needs to be said.
And that is that I love you.
I support you and I want you to see my attitude of gratitude.
EVERY DAY:
Love
and
Gratitude
https://www.instagram.com/GratiDude_abides
KevinACarpenter@gmail.com/941.894.8030
Thank you sincerely.
IN LIFE AND GOLF, GET BETTER…..NOW!
HERE: https://grateful4.org
Every day, every way, grateful.
KC
I am here to help, add somebody that needs a “check up from the neck up”
KevinACarpenter@gmail.com
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