Merry Christmas Youth of Today, Leaders of Trauma! Here, unwrap your traumas!
The cliché picture is worth 1000 words has obviously earned its keep for being true a great deal of the time.
You can go ahead and file today’s serving under the “you never know what folks have been through” and “don’t judge a book by its cover”.
I recently, over the last few years, have Golf Industry Vets tell me that that for a decade or two they thought Kevin Carpenter was some silver-spooned surfer kid from Cali who had an easy ride and breezed into the Golf Industry in 1997 and had a PHD(Poppa Had Dough).
Shiiiiiiiiiiit.
I was collecting cans in Michigan Football games for money in 1978 at age 10 and have been working ever since.
Doubt me?
Ask around.
Refereeing basketball professionally at age 14, DJing College and High School Parties with DJ Treble Tee and ‘In The Mix Productions” at Age 16.
Do NOT step to me what that bullshit. Ask me about me, I’m an open book.
And you want to know how I have the courage to start me career over at the age of 50 and go all in on my directions and instructions from God and The Universe?
All you need to do is meet The Jedi.
The Jedi of Ann Arbor that is…..
Looking at this picture back from Christmas Day 1981, there isn’t a whole lot going on from appearance sake.
But because I’m the dough eyed kid on the right looking at the camera I’m here to tell you that there was a hell of a lot going on behind the scenes and it really didn’t reveal itself until the lights went out. Let me explain.
The other kid in the picture still lives in my hometown of Ann Arbor, Michigan, and we’ll just call him the Jedi as that’s been one of his nicknames for many years due to his proclivity and masterful ability to sneak into world class, sporting events without a ticket.
We started developing the skill together back in the 70s when we literally snuck into anything and everything we ever wanted to go to. We never paid a penny and we always got in and I’m not joking even a tiny bit creative we were gonna get in and we always got in.
It wasn’t always pretty but survival can get ugly folks. And if it’s a Michigan Notre Dame football game and there’s 110,000 people you can believe that me and Jedi are going to be two of those 110 thousand.
But, I degrees…..
In this picture, it’s Christmas Day because the camera was out and I also remember the decorations the locations the details and I went and saw Jedi every single Christmas and we hung out together on that day since we are about six years old.
I met John when I was learning how to walk on the same street I grew up on when I was 11 months old.
I read the obituary at his dad’s memorial service when I came up from Florida about 20 some years ago when he died at about my age today.
He drank himself to death straight up with vodka, seemingly as fast as he could with as much vodka as he could take every single day, and it had to be on ice, or the kids would feel a ring, literally upside their head.
Do you know the stone that sticks out from a class ring, how hard that is?
Can you imagine, Larry would turn the ring around on his finger so the HARD ass stone could be facing DOWN in his palm.
He would then swing his fat meathook in the general direction of his precious children’s skulls(Jedi or Jedi Lil Sister) and it would strike and make a “knock” sound.
The kids would cry. Instantly.
The very instant the ring hit the spot they store their brain and consciousness.
His dad’s name was Larry and he was a beautiful, incredible loving, kind man BEFORE he started drinking Vodka at noon or 3 pmish. Larry was known for being a Drunk and also for helping ANYONE he could ANYTIME he could, and my mother Eugenia adored Larry until the day she died.
He was a second father for me. He loved me like a son, and I love him forever..
However, he was a very tortured soul, physically emotionally verbally abusive, and he left scars so deep on the people around him that they either ran away, became addicts, divorced him, or simply vaporized(like Jedi’s Mom in 6th grade. Just literally disappeared….craziest shit ever.)
Jedi is a Miracle of God in that he actually survived to live a relatively normal and healthy life in the end, and we are very close to this day and talk regularly.
Thank you God and the Universe.
Back to that lovely photo……
This night, as we were going to sleep, Jedi’s house is one of the few places that I didn’t have to worry about the bed when I went away from my house. That was something I had a problem with as soon as my parents started to have issues and my dad’s health got messed up….I started wetting the bed. BTW, sorry Scotty, I pissed your bed a few times ha ha.
I still haven’t really unwound it and understood what was going on and how my mind was reacting but I put together the time frames and realize that’s what was going on.
Jedi, on the other hand, would wait as long as he could for me to go to sleep so that he could start crying.
To this day, he doesn’t know that I knew, but I knew.
And it still breaks my fucking heart.
In two clean pieces.
The quiet whimpering, the muted pain, the stifled suffering, the confusion, the anxiety, the guilt, the shame for no good reason.
I’m so sorry, buddy.
There was NOBODY in our schools talking about this stuff, NOBODY offering any resources, nobody reaching out and there were no conversations or any clear honest talk about the energy and what was going on in our respective houses.
This is when kids start making up answers, and telling deep dark lies to themselves.
This is how Tito’s Vodka was able to sink his teeth into me, these nights, this is where Tito was laying his groundwork.
It was just weird, strange energy shifts with no explanations and all of the kids left. Just trying to figure this shit out.
All the kids whose parents went through divorces and had weird shit going on in my educated liberal college town of Ann Arbor.
None of the parents had the courage or the tools, the insight, the wisdom to have real conversations with their kids to explain this shit when it was going on.
So guess fucking what?
ALL of us ended up with some screwed up addiction or unhealthy attitude towards ourselves.
We all told ourselves so many lies that we’re still trying to unwind. It actually makes me really angry when I think about it.
I heard recently about an old friend from Ann Arbor who apparently felt like he was getting out of control or hitting rock-bottom and he just came out of rehab for the first time.
When I heard about that, I thought there goes another casualty of a latchkey kid with no communication no understanding of how his own mind works.
No mentorship around mental health practices.
No neuroscience based counseling around leveraging daily affirmations and the power of self talk.
No facilitation of sharing the readily available free tools that simply need conversation to put into play.
This picture is my WHY folks.
I’m not a complainer, sit on my ass dude.
Are you?
Here is my How:
www.Grateful4.org
Will you please help us?
Attitude of Gratitude!
EVERY DAY:
Love
and
Gratitude
https://www.instagram.com/GratiDude_abides
KevinACarpenter@gmail.com/941.894.8030 Text me your celly-cell so I can build my database please…..
Thank you sincerely.
The G.I.F.T. Today
Grateful: for a huge serving of what my life is going to look like going forward as I had magical energetic encounter that elevated my expectations. Forever.
Intention-nice balance of productivity and catching up while keeping the flowing fountain vibe throughout
First-send that image from my dream
Things-make sure Bean can make movie(Brando, On The Waterfront!!!).
REGISTER YOUR SPOT TODAY PLEASE PEEPS AND PLAYERS, GET BETTER…..NOW!
DOUBLE DONATION MODEL; ONE NOW, THE OTHER WEEK 6 BASED UPON RESULTS
Every day, every way, grateful.
KC
I am here to help, add somebody that needs a “check up from the neck up”
KevinACarpenter@gmail.com
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